Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
