We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Randomize
