i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Where did you get a picture of my penis
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
We talked him into tasing himself.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
