eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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