I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
Randomize
