Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
Randomize
