sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
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