maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
Randomize