Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Randomize
