thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
Randomize
