I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
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