the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Randomize
