I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
My feet surprised me
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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