How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
