If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
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