I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
