Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Randomize
