Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
