I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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