some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Randomize
