Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
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