we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
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