his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize
