Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
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