summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
if i died would you start the facebook group?
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
If its not for food we ain't going out.
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Randomize