...so i touched it.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
Randomize
