I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
