Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
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