I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
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