I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
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