Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
Randomize