I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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