Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
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