therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
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