On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
Randomize
