i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
