matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
North Korea, Best Korea!
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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