So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
