it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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