Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
