wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
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