How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
