my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
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