i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
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