why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
