a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
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