So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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