I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize