I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
