those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
Randomize
