Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
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